So I haven’t written on here in a while, because things have been pretty bad. Back on meds, upping my dosage. Having more panic attacks than is usual for me. And while I seem to be managing to attend most of my commitments and academic timetabled things, it’s pretty stressful being at University when it’s campaigns week, and also people are coming in on open days. Hectic is how I would describe campus in one word. Which doesn’t do much for my usually shaky self.
There isn’t too much on work wise, but the main stress right now is trying to remain on top of things and not sink into the places my mind seems to have wandered to in the last few weeks. Today has been fairly positive, and very productive compared to most days before this one. Yesterday was ok too, but pretty stressful. And I’m worried that I’ll spiral into an incredibly busy schedule again, which ultimately exhausts me. My doctor’s making me see her regularly so that gives me something to keep track of how I’m doing. And I’m going to try and keep in better contact with my tutor and talk to my department, which is something I used to be very afraid of. It really depends how I feel each day.
I haven’t been in the mood to post for a while, and I think I might take some time at the weekend to try and structure something a bit better, but I just wanted to check in and it’s a positive for me that I can even get a few words down on the page.
Hope you’re all doing ok